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Monday 2 August 2010
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THE JULY HANDICAP AND MY EXOTIC ISLAND HOLIDAY

Nellie and I have been fantasising of going on holiday to an exotic island at the end of the year. We would love to go to Bali.
But then reality sets in and we laugh at the fact that on our budget we will be lucky to afford a holiday to Belhar.

Now I, very sporadically, adhere to the ‘You can’t win it if you are not in it’ phenomenon.

The favourite pastime at the White House on Saturdays is betting on the ponies.
Everyone has a Telebet account and on Saturdays the guys are always braaing, imbibing and betting.

So, when the juices and espetadas were flowing at the daughter's birthday party and Papa O said ‘It’s the July tomorrow. Why don’t you guys come around for a braai,’ my mind turned to Bali.

Last year the July Handicap quartet paid over R400k.

That should take care of Bali right?

I used to be an avid punter, but years ago I grew tired of being ‘One Out.’ And lost interest.
When I used to play, if I played the Pick Six I would have five winners. One Out.
If I played the Quintet I would have four winners. One Out.
If I played the Jackpot I would have three winners. One Out.

I made up my mind to just take one bet in the main race, and armed with a bottle of Jam under one arm and a bottle of tonic water under the other, I headed for the White House.

I waited patiently for the main race, resisting all temptations and proddings to ‘try’ a small bet in the early races.
I boxed 7 horses and played the quartet for R300 and the same horses for the Trifecta for R200.

The quartet paid R15k, and you guessed it, I had the first three past the post. But the fourth place? One Out.
Fortunately I won the Trifecta, but it only paid R430.

By now I was Jamming so I promptly and fairly blindly played another quartet in the following race.
One Out.

So much for Bali.
Looks like we’re back to Belhar for now.

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