‘Jarre. We need some fresh ideas
man.’
‘Let’s do an Ol’ Skool Party.’
‘Yor! Again? We need to move with the times man.’
‘Do you have any better ideas?’
‘Why don’t we do an Ol’ Skool Bottle Party.’
‘No Man. Let’s do a Bottle Party, but a House
and Hip Hop Bottle Party. And we throw in some Sexy R&B.’
‘That’s going to chase away the older market.’
‘Forget about the older crowd. You know how fickle
that market is.’
‘It’s true. They only come out once-a-month
anyway.’
‘I don’t know. People like commercial music
whether they are younger or older.’
Then, we call some long-forgotten DJs from
yesteryear – the same ones we have been booking for
years and who all play the same music and we ask them to
drop their price because times are bad.
Next, we come up with a catchy name, like Ol’
Skool Bottle Party.
We then get the
‘marketing manager’ to design
a flyer with a pic of a sexy babe or two on it and
create an event on Facebook.
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We don’t really do flyers any more.
It’s so expensive and such a hassle to distribute.
The ‘distribution team' throws them in the
rubbish bins anyway.
And, the council charges us R120 for every poster we want
to put up on street poles, and if we ignore them and plaster
the posters all over the place, they fine us R300 per poster.
If we refuse to pay the fine they cut our electricity. Then
we have to call Petric Letric again to come and bypass the
meter.
So we invite 6000 people on Facebook.
The same 6000 that we invite every week.
117 of this 6000 respond on FB saying they will be attending,
and 7 of them actually come to the event.
But, we know that we can’t really
trust FB, so we pull out our trump card.
‘Ladies Free Until 11pm!’
And, just to cover ourselves, we post ‘Send me
your guestlist before 10.30pm’ all over Facebook.
We even post it on other event pages and on the walls of
complete strangers.
Then, we sit back and wait.
The following Tuesday, we have a ‘feedback’
meeting.
The conversation here usually goes like this.
‘The turnout was disappointing
hey?’
‘Fok man. What’s happening in Cape Town.’
‘I told you. It’s the timing. The timing was
bad. It’s the exams/fast/lent/ middle of the month/recession/etc/etc/etc.’
‘Yor. We shouldn’t have done a Bottle Party.’
‘Ok guys. What are we going to
do next week? Any ideas?’
This post is getting too long, but that’s
a good thing, because now I don’t have to think about
a topic for tomorrow’s post.
Tomorrow I will tell you all about the Mo’City
Style party concept that is launching at Club 91 in
Claremont on Friday 29 October.
