FUNNY CLASSIFIED ADS Newspaper ads are fast making way for online ads on sites such as gumtree, who offer the service for free. But, be it printed or online, classified are still a good source of finding the best medicine. Here is a list of classics that will, at the very least, bring a smile to your face as you pretend to be busy while waiting impatiently for Friday.

Complete set of Encyclopaedia Britannica. 45 volumes. Excellent condition. R1, 000.00 or best offer. No longer needed. Got married last weekend. Wife knows everything.

Help wanted, singer for local rock band. Must be female or male.

Wanted, man to take care of cows that does not smoke or drink. Three-year old teacher needed for pre-school. Experience preferred.

Washing Machine and tumble dryer R300. No longer needed. Joined nudist colony.

Cows, calves never bred…also 1 gay bull for sale.

Nice Parachute – Never opened. Used once.

 

Have Viagra, Woman wanted. Any woman.

For sale: an antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers.

Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.

Dinner Special -- Lamb R35; Chicken or Steak R25; Children R15

Used Tombstone. Perfect for someone named Homer Bensfeldt. Only used once.

Toaster: Perfect working order. Automatically burns toast.

Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for efficient beating.

And now, the Superstore--unequalled in size, unmatched in variety, unrivalled inconvenience.

Kader Khan
Editor
info@yummie.co.za