Based on personal experience, I am writing a series of articles on personal growth towards a balanced, fulfilled and happy life, for the simple man.

Ultimately I will compile the articles into an E-Book that I hope to eventually sell online.
In the meantime, I will regularly post excerpts from the work, The Pleasure Cruise to Heaven on the site, where you can peruse them free of charge!

The two articles that I posted under the heading Hello God is part of this work and has already generated quite a stir.
I welcome comments - positive or negative – so please feel free to make use of the ‘Make a Comment’ module at the bottom of the page.

There are many books on the subject of Self Improvement and Personal Growth out there – and I have read quite a few.
The content of these books are largely similar, and the majority of them include a chapter on religion and God.
These inclusions are usually towards the end of the book, where the author praises and thanks God for his grace.
It would normally take the form of ‘Without who’s wisdom this book and the insights therein would not have been possible’ – ‘Above all I thank God for guiding me and giving me the inspiration….’, or something like that.

I contend that addressing the issue of God is the premise of a balanced, fulfilled and happy life, and to that end I will start this work by doing just that.
This is by no means a religious chapter.
Merriam-Webster defines the word religious as:
- relating to or manifesting faithful devotion to an acknowledged ultimate reality or deity.
I do not claim that this work is ‘an acknowledged ultimate reality’, I am not seeking your ‘faithful devotion’, and I am certainly not a ‘deity.’ (one exalted or revered as supremely good or powerful)

Nowhere does anyone disclaim that the books of the great religions is a patchwork put together many years after the actual events.
I believe that over millennia these noble attempts at establishing a code for co-existence have been distorted and manipulated to where today it does not hold any water.

I also believe that such a moral code is essential to co-existence, and it is certainly paramount to living a balanced, fulfilled and happy life.

In this work I am simply sharing my experiences, observations, opinions and deductions along this path.

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HELLO GOD: PART ONE

Thursday 15 January 2009
hello god
it’s so nice to finally meet you
i’ve heard so much about you
finally i can put a face to the name

you don’t look anything
like the picture that I had in my mind

I’m so happy
to have you as a friend
i can’t wait to introduce you
to some of my other friends

Ancient Hindu legend has it that at one time all men on earth were gods.
Man abused his privilege and destroyed his right to enjoy his Divine Heritage.

The Brahma God, God of all Gods, then decided to remove the Godhead from man.
He was very much puzzled as to what to do with it.
He wanted to hide it where man himself would be unable to find it.

Rather than assume this great responsibility, the Brahma God decided to call a meeting of all the other Gods to help him decide where to hide man's Godhead.

The Brahma God asked for suggestions.
One God suggested that the Godhead be removed from man and placed on the highest mountain peak.
The Brahma God said: "No, do not hide it there. Man will climb the mountains and he will scan its highest peaks and find it."

Another God suggested that the Godhead be buried down deep in the ground.
The Brahma God said: "No, do not hide it in the ground. Man will dig in the ground searching for gold, silver and other precious metals, and there he will find it."

Another God suggested that they sink it in the deepest part of the ocean.
The Brahma God said: "No, do not hide it in the bottom of the ocean. Man will dive and search out the bottom of the seas and there he will find it."

Finally, the God of Wisdom said: "Then, let us hide the Godhead deep down in Man himself." "Yes," the Brahma God said, "we will hide it there, because Man will never think to look for it within himself."

It is still there, and mostly Man is constantly digging, climbing, searching, looking for it everywhere but in the right place.

****

HELLO GOD – PART TWO

There are two fundamental errors in the prevalent concept of God.
The first is perfectly illustrated by the Hindu legend posted as Part One of this series.
That is the belief or concept that God is ‘within’.

In simple English, we are to believe that God is inside of us, and in order to find him we need to search deep inside ourselves.

The second error is the concept that God is ‘without’, as preached by Western religions such as Christianity, Judaism and Islam.

Both of these concepts corrupt spiritual thinking.
They promote the idea that God and oneself are separate, and to believe that from God can come something that is not of the substance of God is absurd.

This belief that God and oneself is separate spawns the question ‘What is mans purpose in life.’
Western religions lead us to believe that man is on earth to prepare for when s/he returns to God.

This promotes the idea that man and God are separate and hampers ‘peoples right to pursue their lives, interests and pleasures, free from harmful social conditioning, from exploitation and domination by covert political and economic forces which seek to enslave them, and from repressive authoritarian governments, rapacious capitalist corporations, mendacious religious organizations, fraudulent international bankers and the unholy alliance among all of these, which works to deprive the common people of all countries of their freedom and happiness, and the full realization of their spiritual potential.’
'SERENDIPITY'

I never left God.
God never left me.

God is not separate from me. He is not inside of me, nor is he ‘out there.’

I am inside God. I am part of God.
I may be a minute part of God, but I am an essential and complete part of God.
My purpose therefore is to live.

****

HELLO GOD PART THREE

Now that I accept that I am part of God and that my purpose is to live, I can begin defining ‘to live.’

I am part of God, and it goes without saying that I recognise the fact that everything else is part of God, and as such I should live and co-exist in harmony with the rest of God.

The essence of living is love, and the premise of love is loving myself.
Love is not an emotion. The word love is a verb – a doing word - and it requires effort.
Love is in fact hard work.

In order to love effectively it is necessary for me to incorporate all the principles of work into my effort to love successfully.
I need to familiarise myself with and understand the concept, then I need to equip myself with the necessary skills required, I need to devise a plan and strategy, develop a code whereby I will conduct my life, and then dedicate myself to doing everything in my power to nurture the love that I have for myself.

This becomes my personal straight and narrow path to heaven

Once I actively and effectively love myself, I will incorporate others into my love.
Nurturing the love that I have for myself means that I will not do anything to in any way harm, hurt, hinder or disrespect myself.
Incorporating others into my love means that I will co-exist with them in the same way.

Following your own personal straight and narrow path is rejoicing in God. This is what glorifying God means, this is what worshipping God means, and this is what loving God means.

The universe reacts to my action and therefore God rewards or punishes me through my own actions.

It is vital that I grasp this concept completely.
My action determines my reward or punishment in the here and now.
God is not going to reward me afterwards. Nor will God dish out punishment afterwards.

How I live my life determines if I am fulfilled or unfulfilled when I die.
It determines whether I die in heaven or in hell.
Forever. As far as I know, there are no second chances.

I hope to God that at least some of you, even just one of you, will grasp the next few lines.

God is the creator and the judge.
I am a living, functional, complete, intelligent, responsible and very important part of God.
There is but one God, and I will not worship false idols.

****

CHAPTER TWO: HELLO PARENTS

Now that I am acquainted with God, it would be absurd for me to fear God.
I understand that there is no outside force that rightfully controls, dictates, or ordains my life.
I accept that it is my choice to live successfully and my effort alone will determine my reward and punishment.

Living in harmony with the universe entails relating and interacting with all things in the universe, and the first human relationship that I encounter is the one with my parents.

This chapter is about my relationship with my parents and not their relationship with me.

Before we do that, let us briefly look at the concept and role of parents.
Whether conscious or subconscious, bringing a child into this world is a choice, and with this choice comes responsibilities.

Broadly, I am of the opinion that it is the responsibility of both parents to prepare the child for leading an independent productive life with a reasonable chance of happiness.
We will explore this further when we speak of my children.

My parents and their parents, for generations, have been socially subjected to various influences, just like I am, just like my children are.
Culture, tradition, religion, custom and education are just some of these influences.

I may disagree with their beliefs, traditions, customs and relative methods, but I accept who they are.
It is not my responsibility to try and change them and it would be to my detriment to hold them responsible for who I am.
It is not my responsibility to judge them, nor is it my responsibility to punish them.

Maybe it is my responsibility to love them, but I do not emcompass them into my love because it is a responsibilty.
I love them because I love myself.
I love them by choice and I will do anything within my power to nurture that love, without expecting anything in return (from them).
This love is based based on respect, forgiveness and a degree of benevolence.

I will not however, sacrifice my own happiness in order to appease them.
I will not allow them to decide, control, dictate or determine who I am.
I will not worship false idols.

****

HELLO PARENTS: PART TWO

My mother always said ‘Heaven lies under the feet of your parents.’
I am not sure whether this is proclaimed in any of the religious books.
I suspect that she developed this from the islamic equivalent of ‘Honour thy Parents.’

The opposite of this, ‘Honour thy Children’ or ‘Heaven lies under the feet of your children’ rings more true for me. It rings more true for tangible reasons.

The parent chooses to bring the child into this world and with this comes a responsibility.
The same cannot be said for the child, and therefore, the responsibilty of the child towards the parent has to be earned.
It is earned by preparing the child to live ‘an independent, productive life with a reasonable chance of happiness.’
It is earned through love.

Khalil Gibran wrote:
You can give them your love but not your thoughts
For their thoughts dwell in the house of tomorrow
Which you can never visit, not even in your dreams

Social conditioning, and various other influences, unfortunately causes most parents to do exactly the opposite.
They attempt to instill their thoughts into their children.

Compare this to the music teacher, who exclusively teaches the pupil a particular genre of music – like jazz or classics – because that is his personal preference.
This teacher is attempting to clone himself, and in the process he is stifling the creative aspect of the pupil’s potential.
A true music teacher teaches the pupil the rudiments of music and the practical technicalities of the chosen instrument, while at the same time encouraging the pupil to explore and develop his creative talent.

Unless the first pupil realises the error of the teacher’s ways early on in his/her career, he/she will never be a truly succesful musician.
And later on in life the musician will probably resent the teacher.

The second pupil has a reasonable chance of attaining success, and this pupil will undoubtedly honour his teacher.

I am grateful that I recognised the error of my parents’ ways.
They were probably doing the best that they could, and they believed that they were doing the right thing.
In the process, and unwittingly, they have clarified how I should attempt to raise my own children

Today, after they have passed on, I can truly say that I love my parents. I forgive them, and if I could have the opportunity, I would do anything to practice this love.
They were old and frail when they died.
They needed my love.
They deserved my love.
It would not have cost me anything to love them.
Unfortunately, I did not know this at the time.

****

HELLO PARENTS : PART THREE

“From your parents you learn how to put one foot before the other. But when books are opened you discover that you have wings.”

Even the so-called holy books prescribe that we ‘seek knowledge from the womb to the grave’ and man’s knowledge is evolving all the time.
If your parents believed that the earth was flat they would naturally have shared this belief with you.

They would have shared this with you because they believed it, and they would most certainly have shared it with you in order to teach to not venture too close to the end of the earth, fearing that you would fall off and harm yourself.

Today, you would know that the earth is not flat, but you probably believe that death is inevitable.

If, fifty years from now, scientists uncover the secret to everlasting life, would it have been wrong for you to teach your children that our time on earth is limited?

Eternal life may seem like a ridiculous dream to you now, but man walking on the moon would have seemed just as ridiculous to your parents.

As a parent, you will experience parental love, probably the most natural love of all.
If you truly love your children, you will practice this love, and it would be natural for you to try and instil your beliefs in them.
You do this out of love.
You do this to protect your children from harm.

This is not a question of whether it is right or wrong.
It is human nature – albeit as we know it today.

Right would be accepting that your children would evolve relative to their own lives and time.
Wrong would be believing that your knowledge is the ultimate.

Right would be accepting that your parents evolved relative to their own lives and times.
Wrong would be believing that your knowledge is the ultimate.

*****

YOUR BEST FRIEND: PART ONE

It is the duty of the parent to prepare the child for an independent and productive life, with a reasonable chance at happiness.
It is not the responsibility of the parent to ensure that the child lives a productive life and attains happiness when the child is older.

This responsibility is yours.

You are, or should be, your own best friend and the sooner you realise this the better.
Nothing in life comes without effort, and it is not reasonable, or practical, to expect others to consistently put effort into ensuring your success.

We often hear the phrase ‘the labour of love’ and we accept that love is a verb, a ‘doing’ word.
If love is the essence of life, and true happiness lies in the process of loving, let us then take an in-depth look at this ‘process of loving.’

There are those who talk of ‘accepting yourself’ as being a prerequisite to loving your self.
Accepting your self is dangerous ground.
Accepting yourself is an obstacle that may prevent you from truly loving yourself.
If love were simply an emotion, then it would be beneficial to accept yourself, but love is a verb and loving yourself entails putting in the effort to improve your life.

If you were obese, would it be beneficial to accept yourself.
If you accept yourself for what you are, or the ‘way God made you’, would you never cut or brush your hair again? Would you stop trimming your nails?

Loving yourself is all about doing everything in your power to improve your self, and this includes your appearance, your financial status, your social status and everything else that living entails.

The key is to find the balance. The key is to aspire to greater things while being grateful for what you have.
It is not the situation that determines who you are. The way you handle the situation is what determines this, and the secret is that true happiness is rooted in the process.
Not the end result.

* * * *

YOUR BEST FRIEND: PART TWO

Understanding love and loving yourself is the key to a successful and happy life.
Look into the mirror and picture yourself as a two-year-old. Love that child by doing everything in your power to nurture and improve that child’s life.
Do this for the rest of your life.

Life is what we make of it.
It is nothing else, nothing more and nothing less.
You don’t deserve anything.
Nobody owes you anything.
The universe does not owe you anything and you have no right to expect anything simply because you are alive.

What you do have is the power to achieve anything if you are prepared to work for it.
There are no restrictions.

If what you are striving for is simply material gain, then I suppose there are no ground rules either.
But, if you are striving for ultimate happiness, and material gain is a part of achieving your goal, there is one simple ground rule.

In a word, this is called respect.
Respect for yourself, and respect for others as your equal.
If your material gain comes at the expense of others, then chances are that you will never achieve real happiness.
The rule is very simple really, and it is rooted in loving yourself.
If you truly love yourself, then you will not do anything to harm yourself.
If you harm others, you are in essence harming your self.

Would you exploit yourself?
Would you enslave yourself?
Would you discriminate against yourself?
Would you abuse yourself?
Would you steal from yourself?
Would you rob yourself?

We all want to be loved.
By loving yourself and then encompassing others in the love that you feel for yourself, you are truly loved.

* * * * *

THE COST OF LIVING: PART ONE

No matter what your view is, in this day and age living comes at a cost.
Irrespective of the downfall of communism or the shortfalls of capitalism, it’s a reality.
Living comes at a cost.

Your independence and its relatives, happiness and fulfilment, is directly related to the amount of money that you have, and money had to be earned.

This is one of the pillars of ‘equipping your child to have a reasonable chance of realising an independent, fulfilled and happy life.’
If your parents did not equip you in this way, tough shit. Get off your butt, stop bitching and start equipping yourself now.
Its never too late and no one else is going to do it for you. No friend, no rich relative, no husband or wife, and certainly no Zuma, Zille or Obama.

I have heard two explanations for the abbreviation LSM.
The first and official one is Living Standards Measurement, but this is something that is used by others to put you in a box.

LifeStyle Management on the other hand is something that you are in control of.
You are free to choose your own lifestyle with the relevant cost of living.

Your own effort will then determine your ultimate success.

Traditionally there are two ways to invest your effort in order to earn a living.
Either way you will have to invest some of your time.
Some look at this as a sacrifice or even an infringement on your freedom.
The reality is that is an essential element of living and without your own money you don’t stand a chance in hell of achieving that happy and fulfilled life.
And that means that you will never be free

Working for a boss, means that you will be investing almost half of your life to earning a living, your income would be subject to you putting in the hours, and your income will generally be based on your time invested rather than the result of your effort.

Working for yourself means that your can determine your own working hours and your effort could result in a residual income which in turn allows you to eventually invest less time.

The choice is yours, but remember that there is more to life than earning a living.
Much more.
The key is, once more, to find the balance.

You are also absolutely free to choose whether to adjust your lifestyle to your income, or your income to your lifestyle.

Kader Khan
Editor
info@yummie.co.za